Get it Girrrlll

I'm constantly judging and making fun of my brother for having these philosophical revelations, daily I might add, and I ended up having one today. I was thinking about how short our life is...we never really know how long we have. I've been wasting so many of my days not doing anything..just sitting here waiting for things to happen to me. I've never really been a "do-er". I have to be more assertive. I need to feel more confident and comfortable though. I think that this whole working out slash losing weight thing will not only benefit me physically, but emotionally and socially as well. I have noticed myself growing more confident as of recent and I'm hoping that it will grow as I become more comfortable in my body. I just need to keep sticking to this diet and exercise plan. :)

I've just been thinking so much about how we are only children once, and that time never comes back around again...and these phases in our lives..all of them only come around once for us. We are born, go to school, work, move out, have kids, have kids who have kids..and then we die- and not always in that order. It just baffles me that this is the only time in my life when it will be socially acceptable to be jobless...and then once I have a job, I will be working for the rest of my life. Growing up I had a nice house, but it wasn't one that I invited my friends over to come see or show off. I'm never going to have that opportunity. As an adult, I'll have that opportunity, but it won't have the same meaning. I was never popular, and since clicks are out at the workplace (supposedly) I won't ever be the one who's adored most. Those ships have sailed past me. I just am realizing that I cannot take anything for granted anymore. I have my bad days, and sometimes they're filled with regret, but I think that as I continue to grow older and wise, I am accepting that my life is good, and that I don't want to waste moments being sad or mad or generally feeling down. I need to be happier and feel good. Because all of the moments that I'm not pursuing something to make me a better person, are wasted moments that I could've been happy if I hadn't been sitting around waiting for stuff to happen.

"With Every Beat Of My Heart" by Taylor Dayne