2 Steps Forward, 1 Step Back

I've been thinking about what I'm doing wrong and why I seem to lose weight, plateau, lose weight, gain weight, plateau, lose weight...etc. I think that I've been approaching weight loss from all the wrong directions. I am constantly taking this one day at a time, and while that has its benefits, I need to keep reminding myself that this is for the long-term effects, and it's going to take longer than I may want or expect it to. I wanted to drop about 50 pounds by this December. Though I think that this is reasonable, I also have to realize that I want to keep it off, and also tone my body all at the same time...that takes time! I'm not trying to underestimate myself here, I just want to be reason with my own expectations, that way if I do plateau again, I won't get discouraged. Yesterday I ate so much food, and I think it's because I'm consistently eating less and less, and then I'll binge for a day-not a great habit, ever. I ate about two giant bowls of Chinese rice porridge, a huge foot-long sandwich, about five small plates of sushi, and ended the night with Japanese chocolate mushrooms and an almond cookie...all in all, a ridiculous amount of food, period. I feel kind of disgusted today thinking about how much I ate yesterday. And to top it all off, I didn't even workout yesterday! So today going to the gym, I'm going to do my normal strength training, and cardio, thinking about how delicious that food was yesterday, and if I want to enjoy meals like that all the time, then I have to work my butt off unless I plan to gain back all the weight I've worked so hard to lose. I really don't want to limit myself to certain foods, because I think that restriction is the number one reason why I failed at losing weight so many times in the past. Instead, I'm going to plan out meals, but realize that if I stray here and there, it's okay, but not to go nuts and change everything on the menu. My mind and my body constantly want different things. Instead of forcing a diet, I want it to come naturally. I want to consider food fuel for my body instead of comfort for my mind. That's what it should be anyway...it's training both my mind and body to work together that will be the hard part. 

I'm sorry if this post was a bit wishy washy. I wrote it in two different sittings!

And now music time:

"Steal My Sunshine" by Len

Love and all that,

l